Surfing Sci-Fi: Doctor Who – “Closing Time”

 
Yes, these spoilers are going to kiss you. Would you like that? Of course you’d like that, these are spoilers. Look away, now back to these spoilers – these spoilers are now diamonds! They’re not a horse however, and they may have done that impression one too many times last night, but pucker up, these spoilers are moving in.

 

 
 
 
 
Honestly, I don’t know why I was surprised that I enjoyed this week’s outing as much as I did. Gareth Roberts hasn’t done us wrong in the past (‘eh, maybe The Shakespeare Code), and considering this is the sequel to the out-of-left-field sheer awesome that was The Lodger, I still came away having thoroughly enjoyed myself more that I expected – perhaps even more so than in recent weeks. If a finger were to be placed on the why, then it would be tapping on the lighter and warm and tinglies that, while present, have been compacted somewhat lately by the grandiose arcs and high drama, to which I am a dotting advocate of.

So the surprise really came in the form of a one-off gleaming gem of an episode that could feel as just and hold its own amongst its high-brow peers.

What was masterful was how its narrative effortlessly combined the comical whilst still addressing the fallout of the Doctor’s epiphany from last week. That said, the episode isn’t without its faults, though they are scant and more akin to niggles than anything else. The glaring one being that the Doctor decides to visit Craig, as funny and nice as he is, on the day before he dies. Perhaps he was also going to pop by to see Amy and Rory, but his ‘getting involved’ got in the way? Surely he would have, right? But then I’m reminded of how he backed away at seeing them in the shop and I’m not so sure. If his visit to Craig and Sophie had been at another point during his solitary two-hundred years, fine; but the last day before he kicks the bucket spent with a relative acquaintance? It doesn’t sit right, though it is slightly more comfy after essentially sleeping on it, it sort of does, in a fashion. That’s him – that’s the Doctor, and considering that his recent revelation. it is the ultimate selfless act, atonement, to put the world, once again, ahead of himself for the very final time. Well…

Then there’s my everyone’s favourite monster-of-the-week, the Cybermen. It feels weird that a Big Bad such as them, very much secondary to the plot are put into a lovey-dovey soppy episode. I did have a ‘robots in a haystack of love’ analogy, but it invoked a scary mental image and I’ve just realised that I’ve actually put it in. No internal monolog when in front of a keyboard, I tell you. Roberts reasoning I particularly like and can get behind, being that he felt there should be a “sense of history about the Doctor’s final battle.” You can’t argue with it, and no doubt that if we didn’t know that there was going to be a next season and that he’d be alright, that it’d work to its fullest design. A case of knowing too much to the detriment of dramatic irony if ever there were one.

Again, niggles, but when you have a fantastic duo in Matt Smith and James Corden, and the wonderful interplay and exchanges that makes the below Quotes section a hard task to not list every single line, it’s easy to forgive; especially so when both put in incredible performances, with Matt once again never ceasing to amaze with his portrayal of the Doctor – balancing between the lighthearted man and the man whose guilt has very much come to the forefront of his character. I know I’ve mentioned it quite a few times in the past, as well as countless others, but with his Doctor, you honestly believe that he is an old, old man. It’s physical as well. You go back and look at last season, and then you look at him now. Sufficed to say that he is another year older, but he ‘just’ looks older, wizened. Now if that isn’t method acting.

There’s not much else to say, honestly. A touching tale with more hearts than a Time Lord, where the day can be saved by love. Literally. If a little cheesy. Personally, I’m letting this one slide – hell, I’m rooting for the love angle. It’s not often that good fathers are seen on TV, and between this and the latest Sainsbury’s advert, all I can say is that it’s about bloody time.

Oh, well there is – River was/is the one in the astronaut suit. She really is the one who kills the Doctor. I say that with mild confidence, but confidence nonetheless as I can’t see a switch-a-roonie happening that late in the game.

Everything’s come full-circle. This really is where it all begins.

 
Quotes

“Oh, you’ve redecorated. I don’t like it.”

“Yes, he doesn’t like Alfie. Personally he prefers to be called ‘Stomageddon, Dark Lord of All.’”

“No! He’s your Dad, you can’t just call him ‘Not Mum’”

“Doctor, are you going to kiss me?” “Yes, Craig, yes I am. Would you like that? Bit out of practice but I’ve had some wonderful feedback.”

“People like it when you’re with a baby. Babies are sweet. People talk to you. That’s why I usually take a human with me.” “So, I’m your baby?” “You’re my baby.”

“Partner? Yes. I like that. Is it better than companion?” “Companion. Sounds old fashioned.”

“Nope. Hold on. Un-shush.”

“Why do I need a popoose?”

“Save the tears for later, boy-o. Oh, that was crabby/ That was old. But I am old, Stormy. I am so old. So near the end.”

“Alfie, why is there a sinister beeping coming from behind me?”

“I blew ‘em up with love.” “No, that’s impossible. And also grossly sentimental and over-simplistic. You destroyed them because of the deeply ingrained hereditary human trait to protect one’s own genes, which in turn triggered a… a… umm, yeah, love. You blew them up with love.”

“You used up your time for me?” “Of course I did. You’re me mate.”

“Oh, don’t try and remember me. We’ve been far too thorough with your dear little head.”

“I made you what you are. The woman who kills the Doctor.”

 
Wibbly

- The Doctor’s mwah-mwah, first unveiled in “Vincent and the Doctor” (seriously so good), has fast become one of my favourite Eleven-isms.

- Easy. Breezy. Beautiful. Petrichor.

- It’s sad that I knew the former part of the above sentence.

- The slight inflections of muted emotion in their synthesised voices really made these Cybermen – the true Mondasian kind – feel like the good ol’ ones from the Classic series, but I’ll freely admit that might be just me reading/listening into things.

- My crossed fingered hopes that their decaying and rusted forms in the promos were a sign that the Cybermen would receive a new/classic look to finally rid the straggling memories of Pete’s World (‘cus remember, they weren’t Cybermen) sadly didn’t come to fruition, but hey, who knows, one day, right? At least we got Cybermats to solidify their proper roots. They always were a bit of a campy addition, but a killer smile aside, they did sort of lose some of their scare with their scuttling and cutesy face.

- That said, I want a Cybermat, with teeth or without, so cute. Crimbo gift prediction levels at an all time high.

- Shush.

- That repeatedly working on the Chav shop assistant – who was only working there as a stop gap between her next appearance on Jeremy Kyle for the results of her baby’s DNA test and at Colchester Crown Court to face charges of common-Chavery – was just too funny, and also, sadly true.

- Anyone else keeping humming that Semisonic song of the same name as the episode? No one? Just those with a penchant for noughies indie music, or just me, then?

- If this was a Joss Whedon episode, Craig would have almost certainly been converted to a Cyberman. Glad he wasn’t, mind, but it could have been a shocker and really brought home how vulnerable the Doctors’ ‘partners’ are with him, and wouldn’t have felt thematically out of place.

- Does the metallic eye-patch thingy allow Madame Kovarian to see The Silence (even though that’s not their name) and not forget? Or is she one of them with a Scooby Doo mask on? Or are members of The Silence immune to the forgetting? Once more with the ‘or’, does the inside of the eye-patch display an image of one of them so she’s always seeing them, negating the forgetting? Remember Amy taking a photo of them on her phone? Could also explain the four promo shots of the cast wearing them…

- Nevertheless, nice to see them again and work back in the worrying thought that they’ve been steering people and events from the shadows.

- Was hoping that we’d learn more about the manufactured TARDIS first seen in The Lodger, so next week, I’m looking at you.